


Botched

by LocalLeaderKaz



Series: The Art Defenestration as Applied to Arcane Artifacts [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angry Odin (Marvel), Asgard (Marvel), BAMF Harry Potter, Crack, Death, Dimension Travel, Elder Wand (Harry Potter), Evil Overlord Thanos, Fights, Harry is a Little Shit, IN SPACE!, Infinity Gems, Invisibility Cloak (Harry Potter), Magic, Magical Artifacts, Master of Death Harry Potter, Mind Gem (Marvel), Power Gem, Reality Stone (Marvel), Resurrection Stone, Soul Gem (Marvel), Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Time Gem (Marvel), space gem, villain Thanos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:35:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 17,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25424008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LocalLeaderKaz/pseuds/LocalLeaderKaz
Summary: Harry has finally left the Supernatural world! However his wonderful plan of being Banished from there was not as good as he first assumed. He should have listened to Death when he explained why it was a bad idea. Who knew that an all powerful being of death and destruction may know a thing or two about dimensional travel. Eh, he'll keep that in mind next time.For now he has other problems. A botched banishing ritual is pretty low on his list.
Series: The Art Defenestration as Applied to Arcane Artifacts [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1723522
Comments: 54
Kudos: 399





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Rule of thumb: When an all powerful and almost all knowing being gives you advice you should pay attention and heed it. 
> 
> Or be a Gryffindor and end up like Harry. Your choice.

The trip was not as smooth as Harry hoped. In fact it was extremely rough! When Harry was summoned by Lucifer he didn't even notice. One moment he was in front of his cauldron brewing, and the next he was in a warehouse facing three people. It was as if space had moved around him.

This however was more portkey gone wrong. It was like he was riding a rollercoaster. One without a track and at the top speed of his firebolt. It is very unpleasant. Not that Harry had anything against speed. No, he loved it. It was the mix and match color bonanza going on around him along with the jerky movements that was unsettling. 

Harry shut his eyes hoping that it would help only to immediately feel nauseous. With a cut off gag he opened his eyes determined to never blink again. Who needs to blink anyway? Not Harry. Not while this nightmare was happening. 

Something rammed into his legs causing him to spin. Harry just managed to catch a glance of black and green along with an 'oof' before it was gone. “Oh, Merlin no.” He whispered as the spinning became more intense. 

In a desperate attempt to stop, or at least slow down, he spread eagle. Hands out and legs parted as if preforming a cartwheel. All this managed to achieve was add a tilt so he was now spiraling. It was hell. It has to stop! He was going to be sick! Scratch that he IS going to be sick right now!

With one last jerk Harry hit the ground hard. Dust flying up around him getting in his eyes and mouth. With a gut wrenching heave Harry vomited out the scrumptious breakfast he had shared with Death. “Never again.” He groaned between gags. Trying to catch his breathe.”Never ever again.”

It was the worst form of magical transportation he has ever experienced. Maybe Death was onto something when he said not to use a banishing ritual. In fact what had he been thinking? Banishing spells whit out a proper destination in mind just sent the item away. Out of sight out of mind as they say. 

Harry made a mental note to always listen to Death. As the Reaper of Souls obviously knew way more about magical transport and dimension hopping then Harry did. In fact the Death God probably new more about everything than Harry did. He would have been around if not the beginning of time, then at least since the start of life.

With monumental effort he pushed himself into the sitting position. Scrubbing the dust out of his eyes. For the love of Magic he had better be back home. There was no way he was repeating that experience. Opening his irritated eyes he quietly observed his surroundings. 

The first thing of note were the floating rocks. The floating rocks in a gaping black and red abyss backdrop. Harry was pretty sure he was in fact not home. As far as he knows there are no jagged floating rocks on Earth, or an abyss for that matter. Turning his head Harry tried to find some form of land mark. However as he was sitting on a large drifting rock in the middle of nowhere, landmarks were scarce. Well if you exclude the rock.

“Hello little one.” Said a soft gravelly voice above Harry. “What brings you to Sanctuary?” Harry looked up to see a giant... purple man. Or was he Veronica? He did have that interesting cross between purple and blue that the Veronica flowers have. 

The Veronica Man was seated in some sort of floating space chair. Sprawled out like he owned the world. Jeez and Harry thought Voldemort had a thing for drama. Maybe he was more of a Mallow Wildflower then a Veronica. His face even had the lines that Mallow petals have. Although Harry could not see him as a love man so being a Mallow just seems wrong.

“Good evening sir, sorry to drop in unannounced. Wasn't really able to chose where I was going you see.” Ha! Take that Malfoy! Harry can totally be polite and civil. “Would you happen to know where we are? I seem to be a bit lost.” 

Unfortunately the Mallow Man did not look particularly impressed by Harry. “Lost? Are we not all lost, little one? However I would say you have become more lost than others. Sanctuary is no longer a place but more of an idea.” The Mallow Man shifted forward in the chair and laced his fingers together. The change in lighting caused his skin to appear more pinkish in color. 

Maybe he was more of a Pansy? Harry thought following the trail of light. They did come in varying shades of purple. That would account for the color shifts he seems to go through. It was however another love flower. Although it is used in lust potions more than love. 

Harry's eye twitched as more and more purple flowers and their uses ran through his head. Honestly he blamed Neville for this. It was hard to be around the man without learning something about plants. It didn't matter if you want to know or not. 

“I do wonder how you have found yourself here though.” The Pansy Man's bright blue eyes locked on Harry as he sat in the dirt. Harry was pretty sure that he shouldn't answer the non-question. He never gave any clear answers to Dumbledore when he asked non-question.Why should he start now. Plus the position the Pansy Man sat in, and the way he worded his sentences gave off a bit of an evil villain vibe. Harry should know. However he still doesn't know where he is.

“One of life's great mysterious I suppose.” Harry said flippantly while standing up and dusting as much dirt off his cloths as he could. “One moment you are minding your own business and the next you're falling through a void into a pile of rocks.” Pansy was just not going to work. Maybe Hellebore? It at least was not used in any form of love potion and was purple. 

Harry grimaced as he looked at the mess he made. With a flick of his fingers the mess vanished as if it had never been there. The Hellebore Man's eyes widened slightly at the display. Surly this boy didn't just stumble upon his abode. Especially after that display of power. The man went to speak only for a flash of blinding dark light to pop into existence next to Harry. 

A stone sat innocently on the ground at Harry's feet. The rock a dark grey almost black featuring a simple coat of arms. The Hellebore Man's eyes widened further. “... Infinity Stone...” He whispered. Awe and desire dripping from his voice. Meanwhile Harry frowned down at the deranged leech like rock. With a sigh he bent to pick it up.

“No!” Shouted the Hellebore Man. Now making his way down from the floating throne. “Do not touch it.” Harry raised an eyebrow at the out burst. The stone sat in silence seemingly content with its place on the ground. 

“Alright I'll bite. Why shouldn't I touch it.” Harry asked curiously. No one has ever reacted that way towards the stone. Granted it has never just appeared in front of anyone either. The Hellebore Man stood but a meter from the Resurrection Stone. Eyes never leaving it even as he spoke to Harry. 

“It is an Infinity Stone, boy. One of the key powers of the universe. And it is all mine.” The last part was whispered, but Harry still picked it up because of how close the Hellebore Man is. However Harry didn't say anything about the 'its all mine' comment. If the Hellebore Man wanted it then he could have the little bugger. One less problem in his life.

Harry has been trying to get rid of it for years. However he was confused. It was not an Infinity Stone. “I'm sorry but that,” He pointed to the preening rock. “is not an Infinity Stone. It is the Resurrection Stone. One of Death's three artifacts.” 

The Hellebore Man whipped his head around to glare down at Harry. “Do not speak of her, mortal. She is not something you can even hope to touch.” With a deep breath he turned back to the stone. “How did you get ahold of the Soul Stone? It was thought to be lost centuries ago.”

“Well I mean it does call people back from the dead so I guess it could be called a soul stone. However it is not an Infinity Stone. It is a Hallow.” Harry argued completely ignoring the comment about Death. Although he did file away that Death seemed to be a girl here. Which just brought up a whole slew of questions. 

Was Death the same person across dimensions or were there different Deaths? Was Death able to shift its form? Did Death have a definite gender or was it just up to how it felt that day? Was there different Deaths on different planets or just one Death for the whole universe? 

The Hellebore Man hummed staring down at Harry. His electric blue eyes gleaming. “I see you are ignorant of this stone's true power.” He looked like he was going to touch it but then pulled back. “This, mortal, is one of five stones. Keys powers in the creation of the universe. It is not something the likes of yourself should have. Let alone have the power to wield.” The man clenched his fist.

There sat a large metal gauntlet that Harry somehow missed. He blames that on the fact that the overall presents of the Hellebore Man is very distracting. It made it difficult to focus on the smaller details. Slowly he bent down and picked up the stone. It gave a bit of a disapproving hum that only Harry seemed to hear. He held it up gazing into the stone as if mesmerized. 

Holding it over one of the indents in the gauntlet the Hellebore Man dropped it. The stone fall straight into the hole fitting perfectly. “Now that I have the Soul Stone the rest will fall into place.” He whispered. “With this balance will reign in the universe. Not a child to go hungry or a...” He lifted his fist up into the air in triumph! Only for the stone to fall off the gauntlet and hit the ground with a ting. 

The Hellebore Man froze looking at the stone while Harry just watched on blandly. He was kind of hoping the stone would stay with Giant. It gave a bit of a hiss scorching the rock around it. Black smoke making its displeasure known. “What?” The Hellebore Man asked shocked. 

Yeah, Harry could see where he was coming from. Stones didn't normally hiss and show emotion. “It isn't happy.” Harry said helpfully. “It doesn't like to be thrown around. Next time make sure not to drop it. I am sure it will stay with you if you are nice to it.” Well Harry can hope anyway as he had exhausted all the way he could think of to destroy it. 

“What?” Hissed the Hellebore Man again in anger. Glaring at Harry like he was the cause of all his problems. Which Harry found to be unfair. He wasn't the one to drop it onto a metal gauntlet and fling his hand around like an idiot. 

“The Resurrection Stone doesn't like to be thrown around. You need to be more carful. The fickle thing will make its displeasure known if you aren't.” At this point Harry had made it a game to see how pissed off he could make the stone. If he did this with the wand it tends to get a bit murdery. He also doesn't want to do this with the cloak as it is the only one of the three he actually likes. However it is safe to mess with the stone as it just whines and hisses. 

It reminded Harry of the fights he used to have with Malfoy. “Also I don't know what these Infinity Stones are but that certainly isn't one. This is one of the three Hallows. Created by Death to find a Master. A Master of Death.” The Hellebore Man's glare intensified as he picked up the now silent stone.

“This little thing was created by my Mistress to find a Master?” He asked with scorn. “No one can Master Death. Woo her, yes. However to Master is impossible. She has no Master.” He spat. Eyes glowing fiercely. “And what does that make you as you came with the stone? The Master of Death? The Master of my Love?” 

Harry isn't sure what it is about him, but he always seems to piss off super powerful people. He is pretty close to calling it a special skill. Right up there with his Potter Luck. “Well....” It isn't like he was trying. How was he supposed to know the guy liked Death. Or was trying to woo her. How do you even woo Death? “... Yes?” 

Do you cause death and destruction? Going on a murdering rampage bringing more souls into their domain. Or do you do the opposite and try to save as many people as possible from death? Thereby reducing the amount of paperwork they needed to do. It sounded like the Hellebore Man was going for option two with that 'not a child will starve.' comment. Although that 'maintaining the balance' one sounded a bit ominous. 

So lost in thought Harry didn't even notice that the Hellebore Man had quickly made his way over and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. “Then call her, Master of Death. Call Death down to this plain to stand in front of me.” He all but hissed in anger stone clenched in his fist. 

Harry sighed but nodded. He would probably get more answers from Death anyways. Harry waited for the Hellebore Man to put him down, but he just glared. “Oh, you mean like this? While you are holding me up by my shirt?” Harry lifted an eyebrow at him. With a soft growl the Giant gripped his shirt tighter. “Wait!” Harry rushed out, but it was too late. His shirt tore at the edges dropping him to the ground. 

They both stood there stunned for a moment. The man still grasping onto part of the front half of the shirt. Harry glanced down to see a gaping whole leading from the neck to his stomach. His eye started twitching as he glared up at the Hellebore Man. The Giant who seemed to be looking at the material like it betrayed him. Dear Merlin, did he not know what cotton was? 

With a dramatic sigh he snatched his abused shirt piece and cast a quick *repairo*. The shirt swiftly knitted itself back together like nothing happened. With one last glare Harry cleared his throat. “Death?” He asked pretty sure he could just call like he did in the last world curious as to what this Death looks like.

Shadows grew around them. Stretching and darkening almost to the color of ink. Both men turned to a particularly animated shadow. It lifted off the ground forming the figure of a robust woman. The shadows quickly breaking off into a long shifting cloak almost as if fog. Hood pulled up obscuring the face from view. 

“Good evening, Master.... Thanos.” Soft voice like a whisper on the wind. A secret you would only hear if you truly listened. “I felt the shift but had not known it was you. Otherwise I would have greeted you upon arrival.” The shadows weaved around her distorting and hiding. 

This Death was very different from the one Harry meet with Lucifer. While he had been tired and ill motivated in his life. This Death looked like she was just waiting for something to happen. Something to sink her teeth into. Harry bets she takes brakes. She also must have minions that do her paperwork. It just doesn't look like she would bother with something so mundane. 

The other Death could learn a thing or two from her. Also it was getting confusing talking about two different Deaths. It isn't like they have another name besides Death right? Maybe? “Do you have a name other than Death?” Harry blurted out before he could stop himself. 

Death, the girl one, laughed. A soft grinding sound that caused the back of his throat to crawl and tighten. “I'm afraid not Master. Death is the only name I have.” A flash of white could be seen hidden in the shadow of the cloak. 

Then Harry had to come up with something himself. Another name for death. What is another name for death? Kill? Murder? Rot? No none of these sound like names. Let's go about this a different way. What is death?

Well Albus did say it was the next great adventure. However that just seemed like a copout to Harry. So what did he think of when he thought of Death. Well before he actually meet them that is. It was something to avoid. Something that dogged him all his life. It was an end. 

“How do you feel about the name End?” Harry asked musingly. It fit pretty well. Sounded a bit like a nickname as well. Which it basically is. 

“As you wish Master. I shall be known as End.” Death, the girl one now named End, agreed. This seemed to brake Thanos out of his strange frozen state. Which is good because Harry was getting a bit worried. 

“My dear Death.” He whispered taking a step forward. “I have missed you all these years. Did you enjoy my gifts?” He walked slowly towards End as if scared she would run away. His eyes fixed on the entity. 

Slowly End turned to the purple giant. “...Thanos.” Purring the word as she focused on him. “You gifts are pleasing. However not enough. You know you are no immortal. No God.” Her hight extending to match his. One pale almost skeletal hand coming out from the cover of the cloak to rest on his cheek.

Harry was starting to feel pretty third wheelish from his spot off to the side. It was obvious that these two had history. Watching them was getting to be awkward. “Years go by and you grow old. Aging and soon you will be dust. Just like your gifts.” Her hand sliding from the man's cheek to just under his chin. As if holding his head in position. 

Thanos grit his teeth anger and hope flashing in his bright blue eyes. “Soon my love I can join you. Just a bit more time and I will be as immortal as you.” This caused End to laugh again. A loud violent laugh. 

Yeah, Harry was done. This was escalating quickly. He did not sign up for this when he became the Master of Death. It was not his idea of fun to watch Death's trysts. In fact he didn't sign up to be the Master of Death in the first place, but that seems besides the point.

“You will never be like me.” End backed away and gestured over to Harry. “My Master is the only thing that could compare to my existence.” Thanos's eyes locking onto Harry. “He will be my Master until the end of time itself. Perhaps even passed that.” 

That didn't look good. Harry was pretty sure End just set him up. Thanos pulled to his full hight. His hands clenched, eyes blazing in hate. “And if one was to... be passed that title. To become the Master of Death. How would you go about it?” His voice curious and soft. No hint of the anger Harry could see. 

“Why gather three objects of course. Three powerful objects infused with the power of Death. There is a Wand. The Wand of ultimate power. Completely unbeatable as one would say. Then the stone. Black with swirling gray smoke. The bringer of shades.” 

They both looked down at the Resurrection Stone Thanos had dropped on the ground. Thanos's eyes clouded in thought as Harry started getting nervous. “Finally a cloak. Not unlike the one I wear now. Only it appears to be made of liquid mercury. Known to hide you from anything. Gifts from Death to the mort...” She cut off going still. “Ah, I am sorry Master I must be going. Duty calls.” 

With a shift of shadows End vanished. The two were quiet in the wake of her abrupt departure. Thanos locked on the stone and Harry extremely nervous. He was pretty sure Death just screwed him over. Where you even allowed to do that to someone you call Master? 

Thanos delicately picked up the stone. Twisting it this way and that before sliding it into his pocket. Electric blue eyes locked onto him as a viscous smile worked its way onto Thanos's face. Harry was also pretty sure he liked Death in the last dimension more. This one seemed to have it out for him. “Now little one, where are these items of Death?” The giant's eyes held violence as he took a step forward.

The imminent threat of a violent death pressing down on Harry. “Um... yeah, Death's items right? Yeah.” The thing is Harry is supposed to be immortal now or at least that is what he was told. He hasn't really tested that theory though. Harry wasn't suicidal. Well except that one time in the Forbidden Forest. Which he was pretty sure didn't count. 

So in a show of great courage he apparited. Well at least he tried. He also didn't have a destination in mind. So when a large purple hand latched onto his arm well it wasn't a great ride.


	2. Not Again!

The two were spat out in a small metal room. On instinct Harry twisted just dodging a knife now lodged in the METAL wall. Meanwhile Thanos had let go of Harry and was on his knees retching. Yeah Harry could relate with the guy even if he was just threatening him. Apparition was a terrible form of travel and took getting used to.

“What have you done to my Father?” Demanded another voice. This one distinctly female. She was crouched on the ground with another knife at hand looking ready to pounce. A unmade bed behind her. However the most striking feature was her blue skin sporadicly covered in metal.

It looked as if he had apparited into a bedroom. However the most important thing, at least in Harry's eyes, was that this woman was a cyborg. A real life honest to Merlin cyborg! Harry was excited. He never thought cyborgs were real or at least it would take years for humans to advance enough to make them.

“Nebula,” Rasped Thanos from his position on the floor. “capture him.” Nebula, the blue cyborg lady that officially had the coolest name ever, sprung into action.

“Wow, can't we talk about this?!” Harry desperately asked erecting a shield just in time to take the second knife. “I mean surly we don't need to resort to violence?” Nebula kicked out as Harry jumped dodging the leg swipe with a yelp. “Or you know monologue. I am alway open to listen to an evil monologue.”

He shot a bright red stunner with the Elder Wand that had somehow made its way to his hand. Nebula honest to Morgana twirled out of the way. Like some sort of fighting dancer. Stunner harmlessly splashing on the wall behind her.

“The Wand.” Whispered Thanos now making his way to his feet. Although he seemed content to sit back and watch his daughter fight for him. The berk. Although that did mean one less person for Harry to worry about. For now anyway. He could just be biding his time for an opening.

Nebula metal fist connected against Harry's shield. Fine cracks running all along the translucent barrier as he shot another stunner. Right, he needed a plan. A plan of action. A second fist, this one not metal, shattered the shield as Harry skipped back out of the way.

“Are you just naturally strong?” Harry asked in disbelief looking at the unmarked hand Nebula was flicking out. As if shaking the pain off. “I mean that wasn't even a modified hand. How are your bones not broken?” Granted _Protego_ isn't the strongest shield charm out there but still enough to take a punch without so much as a shudder.

Without so much as a word Nebula flicked out another small knife at Harry. A swift _Reducto_ shooting it back at the blue cyborg. It was a trick that Harry had mastered on one of his many nights alone playing the the Elder wand.

The knife was easily caught and thrown again. Like a dangerous game of badminton. The first one to miss would be the one to get stabbed. He could almost see this being a sport in the Wizarding world. Spectators sitting around waiting for the first drops of blood to be spilt. It was honestly less brutal then Quidditch.

Distracted as he was with the fictional rules of the knife badminton game he didn't see the second knife which promptly lodged itself in his arm. The pain making his lapse in concentration quite apparent. “How many knives do you have?!”

A low chuck was an unwelcome accompany to the still playing badminton game. Made all the harder by the knife sticking out of his arm. Which was making its displeasure known very clearly. “You could surrender the wand and all of this will stop.” The voice reasonable despite the ridiculousness of the request.

“Yeah, then you would just torture me instead.” Harry huffed. It wasn't even like he wanted the Wand. However that wasn't the point. No the point was that they were trying to take it from him by force. If Thanos had asked politely Harry would have just given it over. Now though, it was just about spiting the arrogant bastard.

“You misunderstand. I would not torture you.” The low amused timber continued as Harry dodged yet another projectile. This one not a knife. “If you were to freely give up Death's articles there would be no need. You would be free to leave.”

Harry highly doubts that, but was to busy to respond. You see he just remembered how technology and magic don't mix. So he was gathering up magic at the moment. “No one would stop you. It is for the good of the universe that you leave them to me.” Harry snorted. Good of the universe sounded an awful lot like Dumbledore's Greater Good spiel.

With a smile Harry set off an unconcentrated blast of magic. It slammed through he room upending the bed and smashing the father daughter pair into the wall. Harry smiled at the wonderful mess he caused. True it wasn't throwing your problems out the window but just as satisfying.

Or it would have been if Nebula didn't stand up after shaking her head. “What?” He asked betrayed. “Your a cyborg! Shouldn't you be...” Hand waving around as if trying to catch the word he was looking for. “... short circuiting or something?!”

Wasn't that what Muggle technology did upon contact with magic? Wasn't that what all those rants from Hermione were about? How inconvenient she found it when she needed to make a phone call. How the technology in the more heavily warded areas would just up and explode! Harry hadn't wanted the girl to explode but he wouldn't have been apposed.

Hero of the light morals had long ago gone out the window with all other inconvenient things when people started attacking him. You don't give a megalomaniac advantages like that. It was just asking for failure. However it wasn't like he would have intended for her to explode if she did so he was in the clear. You know if that had happened. At least this would be his argument if Hermione ever found out that he saturated a room full of magic in hopes of short circuiting a cyborg.

So plan B it was. With a sift turn and a tightening of his magic he apparited. At least he was planning on appariting when a large purple hand somehow made it to his are AGAIN! While a small almost delicate, if you didn't account for the full on bruising force with which it held, latched onto his ankle. “Are you kidding me?!”


	3. Reality Gem

The shattering of glass was the greeting Harry received from his new unintended environment. Both hands now gone from their respective places. Nebula on her hands and knees a little ways away retching. While Thanos was unsteady getting to his feet.

Harry on the other hand, who had to adapt to carrying two unwanted passengers, was laying on the floor as the world spun around him. This was almost as bad as that time he tried to drunkenly reenact 'Eighty Days Around The World'. Only his renditions was 'Eighty Apparits Around The World'. Somewhere around Korea, at least he thinks it was Korea he was quite drunk, he found himself turned around. He had smashed through the extremely thick and restrictive border spells setting off all kinds of alarms.

The local Aurors had immediately appeared at the scene. Causing a grand chase to ensue. At that time he had probably smashed through a dozen buildings and restricted areas trying to evade capture. He still has a poster as the most wanted in Korea. He can't go anywhere near that country for the rest of his life. Granted he isn't sure it is Korea so it is better if he just avoids all extremely isolationist asian countries for the foreseeable future.

“Who is destroying my collection?! These objects are priceless!” Shouted a voice in Harry's disoriented world. “One of a kind. You can't just brake priceless artifacts.” Harry tuned out the voice as he slowly made his was to his feet. A large glass display panel now being used as a crutch. Where the hell was he?

Thanos's voice played somewhere in the background. No doubt talking to the guy about braking his stuff. A low growl broke through his thoughts just in time for him to brace against a hurtling blue blur. Automatically casing an **_Impervious_** all over his body as they went tumbling through the display case.

A screech of dismay went up from somewhere. Glass shards glancing off his skin as he tries to fight off Nebula. With a snarl of his own he shoots off a wandless _**Bombarda**_ hitting Nebula and sending her careening through more display cases. The sound of shattering glass following in her wake.

Words now drifting up to the forefront of Harry's thoughts. “Now now Collector I have come to do business.” The smooth baritone that represented Thanos was saying. “I have heard that you recently came into procession of a precious stone. One that could be a reality changing moment.”

Stiffly getting to his feet Harry observed his surroundings. Row after row of large display boxes filled the area. “I have many reality changing stones. You are going to need to be a bit more specific.” Came a slightly hysterical voice drawing Harry's attention. A man with spiked white hair styled in a 'I'v just been electrocuted' look stood off to the side. Half hidden by the glass cases.

Thanos's large purple frame was easily spotted near the man. “It is bright yellow and pulses like a beating heart. Filled with power. One of six gems. The Gem of Reality. I'm sure...” The rest was cut off as Harry spun to meet Nebula head on.

A rope coming at him as if it was a whip. Startled he transfigured the metal floor into a shield blocking the blow. He darted in between the displays using the glass to distort his profile. An _**Incarceres**_ shooting out in response.

Nebula dodged and smashed her hand through a display. A large weirdly shaped gun in hand. Harry weaved passed bright yellow energy shots. Its sickly color solidifying his desire to not be hit by it. Glass shattered around them as they traded blows. So far nothing landing or reacting as it should.

Twin screams sounded out from behind him as another container smashed. He glanced to see two women sprinting from the fight. Making their way further into the maze of glass artifacts. The distraction cost Harry as Nebula landed a hard kick to his chest.

A shield wrapping its way around him as he sledge hammered his way through the displays. The knife having been ripped out of his arm with that kick. The wand hummed hungrily in his hand calling to be used. To draw blood from Harry's enemies and Harry was happy to answer that call. If only any of the blasted spells would hit that damned cyborg woman.

Something more solid then glass stopped him. Knocking the breath out of his lungs and causing the world to shake again. Is it wrong to say he was getting too old for this. Because Harry was pretty sure he was too old to be getting into this level of a fight. This was more of his teenage defeater of evil level of fight and that phase has long passed.

With a groan he stood back up on his feet. Thanos smirking down at him on the left and Nebula sauntering up like she had all the time in the world. “I really must thank you.” Started the giant purple grape. “It would seem you have brought me to one of the objects I seek.” He held up a bright yellow gem and dropped it into the gauntlet like he did with the Resurrection Stone. A pulse of energy resounding from it as it fell into place. “The Reality Stone.”

Harry couldn't help it. It just sort of slipped out before his brain caught up with what he was saying. “You should be carful when you lift your hand up. This gem seems like it would take being tossed on the floor just as well as the Resurrection Stone does.” The glare he received in response was totally worth it though.

“It amazes me how you are able to still find humor in this situation.” Thanos hummed eyes alight with hate. “However now that I have this. I have no need for you to hand over the wand.” He clenched his fist sending a wave of power through the air. It rushed to the wand in Harry's hand intent on wrapping around and taking.

Only nothing happened. Well that's not true a lot happened to Harry, but nothing happened as far as anyone else could tell. Harry watched the power, not magic, swirl around the wand only to be harshly slapped away. The wand using Harry's magic to do so. He scowled down at the wand as it hummed innocently. As if it hadn't just hijacked another beings magic like the weird parasite it is.

Thanos frowned and flexed his hand again. More power rushing out to snatch the wand. This time it hissed and whipped magic out at the tendrils. “Really? Your not even trying to be subtle now.” Harry demanded of the wand. “Since when could you just take my magic?” The wand purred and wrapped magic onto his hand like a rope.

Disgusted Harry let go and shook his hand around trying to dislodge the wand. However the magic ropes held strong. Tightening as he flailed harder. Thanos and Nebula watched on in silence as the small human tried to throw away its only weapon and failed.

“...Is he alright.” Nebula asked her father her voice strained as if she couldn't believe she was asking this about an enemy. Rolling her shoulder to dislodge some of the glass shards.

Thanos was quiet. Refusing to answer such a question. It amazed him that such a puny being refused to give up the wand when he obviously didn't want it. A startled yelp made them both lunge. Grabbing onto the little human as he glowed and they were sucked into a too tight tube yet again.


	4. Loki!

The three landed on cold marble floor. Somehow managing to be a more uncomfortable landing then the sheet metal from before. Harry groaned as he sat up. Beautiful spiraling marble columns lined the edges of the open room. Natural light filtering in and a breeze shifting through the hall. The white marble was detailed in what appeared to be real gold.

It was as if Malfoy Manor had been adapted into greek style and then dipped in power. Because the whole area throbbed with it. Ancient and sleepy in its awareness. A shift of air made Harry roll to the side just in time to dodge Thanos's hand. The giant chuckled lightly as he stood up. Completely at home in this ostentation environment. Like all evil overlords seemed to be.

Harry assumed it was the fact that they needed to kiss up to people with money. Upper class parties and small soirees all in a days work of an evil overlord looking to get a project funded. It would make sense that the echelon of society were the people they surround themselves with. That and the need to look at home with the impressive wealth would lead to the easy they portray in such environments.

“Who dares to brake into the halls of Asgard?!” Boomed a voice causing Harry to whip around. A large muscular older man clade in metal armor lounged on a golden thrown. Long red cape draped over the arm of the chair. However it was the face that drew his attention.

Long scar over the left eye and an eyepatch over the right. Medium length bushy white beard with matching long straight hair. Old blue eyes sharp and scanning the surroundings. By Merlin it was like looking into a disturbing mix of Dumbledore and Moody! It was something that Harry never wished to see and can now never be unseen.

Thanos walked towards the man with a smile. “Greetings King Odin. It would seems that we have disturbed you during a time of rest. However I believe you have something of mine that I will be taking back.” The man, Odin apparently, frowned at Thanos.

His mistrustful gaze swept across the room. Taking in the scratches and blood, no doubt. Speaking of blood Harry quietly cast an **_Episkey_** on the knife wound. It quickly sealed shut not even a scar left to remember it by. Which was good. Harry already had more than enough scars.

“I know who you are Titan.” Odin, who Harry has to assume is a real god because that is just how his life goes, sneers. “It is not yours to have. Guards!” Men and women came flooding out from behind the pillars. Their golden armor glinting in the light.

Medieval weaponry adorning each. It really wasn't looking like Harry's day. It was times like these that Harry felt like the Potter curse could be real not just a joke people threw around. 'May you live in interesting times' indeed. He would have to go to the goblins when he gets home to check. There had to be something true in that statement since everyone knew it. Plus the random 'events' he has had to endure so far give enough credit alone.

The only saving grace about this whole situation is that they seem to stick with more short range weaponry as appose to guns. So Harry still had the advantage in this fight. Medieval battle axes have nothing on a quick hex.

Nebula was tense over at the side getting ready to plunge into the mass of golden warriors. While Thanos just smiled at the display. Posture relaxed and easy going. “Ah, you see that is where you are wrong.” He said lightly and clenched his fist. A wave of power washed out from the gauntlet sinking into the floor. Just like when he went for the wand. Only this time Harry was pretty sure it would work.

He had just enough time to look down in confusion as the floor vanished. He will never admit to the girly squeak that escaped his lips as his footing disappeared. Harry Potter does not squeak thank you very much. Fortunately the lapse in manliness was covered up by the shouts and screams of the other falling bodies.

Thinking quickly he had cast a feather weight charm on himself so he drifted instead of fell. While the others plummeted down three floors around him. Harry watched as Nebula summersaulted gracefully in the air before landing on her feet as if she did this all the time. He was not jealous.

Thanos on the other hand just looked like he had been standing there the entire time. The ponce. If Harry didn't hate him before he did now. It was just unfair. The level of arrogant confidence wafting off of the man like a bad smell. If Harry had but a tenth of that he was sure a lot of his problems just wouldn't exist.

It didn't even look like the golden warriors had trouble with the fall. Even if some of them were less than graceful as they landed. Apparently a three story fall nothing but a nescience in their eyes. It was completely unfair. Harry officially hated this universe. His annoyance grew when he stumbled his landing. The feather weight charm causing him to misjudge the landing.

The large hall area was silent. As if waiting for the other to make the first move. It was the calm before the storm. A tightly pulled string just before it snapped. The preparation of a strike from an angry snake. A foreboding... never mind .Harry thought as he watched Nebula shoot one of the golden soldiers in the head. Sickly yellow light beam searing into his face causing him to scream and roll on the ground.

Yeah, Harry was not being hit by that. Someone should really take that thing from her. Also who makes something like that?! The soldiers glared at the woman and charged. Most focused on her but a few of them ran at him. “Wow, wait! Really? I didn't even do anything!” Harry exclaimed to the charging mass.

Thanos smirked at the soldiers as they charged the other two before turning and wandering into the stacks of treasure. He knew that the stone would be in the back. Out of the way and hidden from the causal thief. A section of the wall slid out as he laid his hand on it. Reality Gem doing its job before vanishing from view of the fight.

Harry caught up in the battle didn't notice and even if he had, would not have cared. As it was he was keeping an eye out for any flashes of blue or purple. He didn't trust the others not to make a move during the confusion. The saying an enemy of my enemy is my friend is a lie. A sweet good intentioned thing that really only ends in a three way brawl.

He shot off a _**Bombarda**_ into the mass trying to catch as many as he could. Sadly they were well trained and dodged the bright red blast that tore up a section of the white marble floor. Shards flying through the air but bouncing harmlessly off the armor. A couple of guards looked down at his wand and scowled. “Is that you Loki?!” Shouted a woman long black hair tied back out of her face.

The amount of scorn in her voice warned Harry that even if he was this Loki guy he should say no. The only problem was that he took to long to say it. So now it just sounded like he was lying. True to form the woman scowled. “Don't lie to me. You have the same black hair and green eyes. Even if you did change you hight to that puny little thing. Your illusions will not work on me.”

Harry's eyes blazed! She had just called him puny! It wasn't his fault that he was small. It was genetic! It isn't like he chose to be smaller than other people. Plus who were they to talk about hight when they were all massive! What was with this universe! Annoyed he sent out a **_Levicorpus_** at the woman. Intent on making her repent for her sizist comment.

Irritatingly she dodged. Curse shooting past her and hitting an innocent bystander, well innocent in the way that he was attacking Nebula not Harry. A surprised shout left his mouth as he was uneconomically pulled up into the air by the ankle. Sword scraping across the marble in a terrible screech.

The woman just raised a delicate eyebrow at him. Like he was an errant child. Now and truly pissed he started rapidly firing spells. A rainbow spectrum of lights flying from his wand. Confusion quickly taking over the battle.

More and more people were looking over at Harry as the spells flew. One particularly hastily thrown **_T_ _arantallegra_** smashed into Nebula. The women not even braking stride as she was forced to dance her way through the fight. Although the hateful glare he received spoke volumes on her thoughts.

Harry figured it was unfair as she just continues taking people out as if nothing happened. Plus she had stabbed him. It was the least she deserved for the pain he had to endure. “Brother!” Came a booming shout from the far side of the room. People moving out the way as someone pushed through.

Soon enough a hulking mass of muscle stood before him. Blond hair wild from the struggle he just endured through the mass of bodies. Large hammer grasped in his hand. “Brother, I thought you lost in the abyss! I watched you fall! Why did you not tell me you were here?” Tears glistening in soft blue eyes.

It was awkward. Harry shifted his feet looking at the brute that claimed to be the brother of Loki. Apparently having witnessed said brother fall into some sort of chasm. Most likely dead. Clearing his throat nervously he responded. “Er, look. I'm not your brother. I'm Harry. Harry Potter.” There was a bubble of silence around his area of the room.

“Stop with the tricks Loki. We both know that it is you. Despite the short stature you have decided to hide in. You didn't even try to hide your coloring!” The man exclaimed. Harry was pretty sure that he was Thor if he remembered the lecture on nordic gods Hermione gave one evening. Something about how runes were connected to them.

“Look I am sure I look a lot like your brother, but I'm not him. I'm not even from around here.” Harry tried to reason. The other golden clad people were glaring at him. However Harry really didn't want to pretend to be Thor's long lost, probably dead, brother. It was cruel on so many levels.

“Nonsense!” He boomed eyes desperate. “Despite your puny figure and lack of muscle, you throw magic around just like him. You look almost exactly like him. Therefore you must be him.” By the end of the tirade he looked proud. As if he just worked out a great mystery.

Harry shifted again getting a bit annoyed at the prick for constantly bringing up his hight. “Look just because something looks like a peach, smells like a peach, and acts like a peach.Doesn't mean it is a peach. Get it?” Hand clutched a bit tight on the Elder Wand. It was surprisingly quiet for once.

“Why are you talking about peaches?” Came Thor's confused response as another person made his way through the heavily armed mob. “Father look Loki is back.” He said to the man that he least wanted to see. The nightmare visage of Odin making Harry's right eye twitch.

“It matters not if he has returned. He brought along the Titan. Seize him.” Odin demanded, and yeah that brought back memories of Moody alright. Suspicious old bastard always looking to arrest people first ask questions later. Harry wondered if this man also never ate anything people gave him. Afraid he would be poisoned. He seemed like the type.

“Father Loki is your son.” Thor exclaimed in horror. Well it made sense if the man could arrest one son based on suspicion what's to say he wouldn't arrest the other? However his attention was drawn away from the family squabble as the soldiers moved in again. Tightening the circle.

With a sigh Harry relaxed his body and glanced down at the wand. “This better be stowaway free.” He drawled while making a tight turn. A harsh crack following in his wake. Startling everyone in the area and causing the soldiers to rush forward thinking he was hidden in an illusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanos's Plunder:  
> \- Reality Gem  
> \- Space Gem  
> \- Extremely annoyed Resurrection Stone... it doesn't like being in a pocket. Especially of the man who threw it on the ground.


	5. Secret Government Organization or Something

Thanos picked up a rubik's sized glowing cube. The light pulsing in his hand seeming to ripple the air itself. With a smile he clinched his fist. Crack after crack appearing on the surface as if made of glass. With one more flex the cube shattered leaving a small purple gem in its wake.

Carefully he dropped the gem into the gauntlet. It fell on the right side of the reality gem. Just over his middle finger. A wave of energy blasted through the area as it settled. Thanos straightened up and grinned down at the gems. He now had two. Two of the most powerful things in the known universe! He was this much closer to achieving his goals.

A sharp crack filled the air disrupting his victory. With a frown he reentered the main treasury. His daughter destroying the Asgardian soldiers on the right side. Just as it should be. However what truly drew his attention was the lack of unruly black hair and spells. The lack of the ' _Master of Death_ '!

Thanos looked on as soldiers picked themselves up off the ground. As if they had run into each other like the fools they are. Odin standing at the side yelling at them for their incompetence. He scanned the rest of the room looking for the one man that had the answers to his dream. The stones would be a very nice bonus to have as long as he can get his hands on the artifacts of Death.

However no matter how much he searched the puny mortal was nowhere to be found. Thanos clenched his teeth. A soft snarl leaving them as he stalked over to Nebula. His daughter having noticed his presents. “It is time to go.” He all but growled out pulling on the power of the Space Gem a purple portal rippling into existence. The other side blurred making it impossible to know where he was going. Though that was unnecessary. It would lead to the one being he wanted.

Nebula appeared on his left despite the efforts of Odin's soldiers now aware of Thanos. A shout drew his attention as a hammer smashed down at his arm. With a tsk, Thanos grabbed the blunt interment. Reality gem activating to add to his already enormous strength. His frown deepened as the hammer continued to be heavier than what he can lift.

“You are not allowed to leave with the tesseract.” Boomed the golden haired man pulling his hammer back for another strike. Thanos nodded to his daughter signaling her to go ahead. It wouldn't due for Harry to be lost.

“I have heard of this hammer.” He said annoyance entering his voice as he dodged another strike. Thor hefted the hammer back into position aiming to land a hit. “Mjölnir created by the dwarves. One of their more powerful creations.” Curious despite the urgency he felt at losing sight of ' _Master of Death'_.

Thor disappointingly ignored his unasked question and continued to swing at him. With a sigh Thanos seized the man by the arm and swung. Throwing him into a cluster of Asgardians off to the side. “As much fun as this is. I am needed else where.” With that he stepped through the portal. The world shifting around him as if he had just walked through a door. This, Thanos thought, is how you should travel.

He took in the metal walls and science equipment surrounding him. The boy or Nebula were no where to be found. With a frown he headed to the door intent on searching for them.

Meanwhile Thor recovered from the throw and saw the portal closing. With a sprint he flung himself through the gateway. It was all he had to follow the thief since the Bifröst was destroyed. With a mighty crash he landed on the other side. Metal table dented underneath him and a broken computer next to him. A man in a full cover black military outfit stood in the doorway looking at him.

“My apologize. It was not my intent to brake your... items.” Thor explained while standing up. Dusting wires and plastic shards off his cloths. “Have you seen a large purple man or a blue cyborg woman? They have come this way not too long ago.”

~~~

Harry was pretty sure that he was not supposed to be here. Well he wasn't supposed to be in those other places either, but this had secret government organization written all over it. The room he landed in happened to be some sort of storage closet. So he couldn't tell at first. What with all the cleaning supplies scattered around him.

However once he left the closet it was pretty obvious. The hall he emerged in was lined with glass on one side. Over looking some sort of laboratory. People in black uniforms ran from one end to the other with giant tubes of some sort lining the walls. A blue gem pulsing in the middle.

The gem seemed to give off an energy similarly to the yellow one Thanos tried to use to get the Elder Wand. Harry narrowed his eyes at it. He could hear something. A soft call that seemed to be just out of his hearing range. It reminded him of the _**Imperius**_. A soft lullaby of safe, warmth, and a desire to give in.

His curiosity got the better of him as the song played. He lifted his wand and silently casts a **_Disillusionment_**. He didn't really want to be caught. Thankfully no one has noticed him yet despite the fact there was a whole wall of glass in front of him.

Done with his preparations he sneaked down the hall to the door. Waiting for the it to open. After about two minutes he realized that this may take a while. He wasn't even sure it was worth the wait. He already had the Deathly Hallows. He didn't need another powerful, almost certainly sentient, artifact. The ones he already processed were annoying enough.

Before he could make up his mind to just leave the unknown mind influencing device, one of the people in a white lab coat left the room. Door sliding open with an air lock sound. Harry quickly slipped in before it could close. His spell keeping him from being seen by the people milling about the room. Well as long as he didn't bump into anyone.

Quietly he made his way over to the blue gem. A large empty space on all sides of it. No doubt to keep people from being too influenced by the stone. Harry was pretty sure he would be fine. He can throw off the **_Imperius_ _Curse_** after all. His natural stubbornness should keep him safe. Especially now that he knows what to look for.

Just as he was about to reach the Gem an alarm went off causing everyone to freeze. confusion on all of their faces. Armed military personal all dressed in black rushed into the room. Some sort of goggle like lens over their eyes. As one, they trained their weapons on Harry. “What?”

He was really confused. Shouldn't they be unable to see him? That is what the spell did. He was also fairly positive he didn't bump into anyone. “Back away from the gem and put your hands in the air.” Called out a stern voice. His uniform slightly different from the rest. Harry figured he must be in charge.

A large red and black patch on his arm caught Harry's attention. However it was too far away for him to see clearly. He figured that it was the symbol of their organization. With a frown he slowly lifted his hands up. Elder Wand pointed at the ceiling in a none threatening manor.

The man scowled. “Drop the stick.” He demanded as he cocked the gun. Harry slowly opened his hand intent on letting the blasted wand fall to the ground, but it stayed stuck to his palm. “I said drop it.” The man growled.

“Look,” He started causing some of the others to jump. “I can't drop it. I would love to put it on the floor, but it won't let go.” Slowly waving his hand back and forth just to prove it. Harry really didn't want to get shot. He had heard that it was a terrible experience.

Not that he thought having a small metal object impaling his body wouldn't be painful, but after having Charlie explain to him what it felt like to be shot he really didn't want that to happen. Sure Charlie showed off the scar as a badge of honor. An example of his dedication to preventing poachers from harming his dragons. However Harry had more than enough scars. He really didn't want or need more.

“Don't move!” The man all but shouted at Harry when he waved his hand. “Slowly walk ten steps forward.” His eyes trained on Harry. Watching each step with predatory dedication. It was unnerving. Just as he reach the last step the main door slid open causing everyone to turn.

There stood Nebula in all her cyborg glory. Blood red leather slightly torn from the previous battle with the golden soldiers. Harry decided to take a cautionary step back well aware of how fast and how many knives the woman carried on her. “Halt!”

She smirked at Harry completely ignoring the men in front of her. Hand playing with yet another sharp implement. “Father was upset you left.” She said playfully. Metal clicking as she walked closer. Harry was fairly sure that she should not have been able to get here so quickly.

“I said Halt!” The military man shouted again gun aimed at Nebula. She just glanced at him and flicked out her wrist. The dagger stabbed through his eye causing him to go down instantly. Everyone was silent as they watched the unmoving body. Nebula still walking forward stride unbroken.

Harry glanced around in slight panic before looking back at Nebula. “Can't we talk this out like adults?” He asked not wanting to get into a fight with her when there are guns in the mix. Almost positive that he would end up getting shot if that happened. Very much aware of his inability to dodge bullets.

“You lost that right when you ran. You should have...” The metal door went flying and slammed into the opposite wall. A familiar ancient looking war hammer lodged in it. A moment later yet another familiar object came flying past. Only this one was the body of Thor who groaned on impact.

Slowly the man staggered to his feet. Blond hair wild. “It would seem that I have underestimated you Titan!” He boomed. Hand stretched out to recall the hammer from the floor. Not dissimilar to a wizard calling their wand. This caused Harry's eyebrows to raise in surprise.

Nebula and Harry watched as Thanos calmly entered the room. Gauntlet now shining with two gems. The power all but doubled from the last time Harry saw it. A deceptively soft smile on his face. “Well it looks like you have brought me to yet another gem, Harry. I can not thank you enough.”

A large purple hand came to rest on Nebulas shoulder. Causing her to look dwarfed in the process. “Go take care of... That.” He said waving divisively at Thor who was readying to swing his hammer again. Nebula frowned but nodded. Heading over to the Asgardian scanning for weaknesses.

Thanos turned back to Harry and the gem. Eyes gleaming with greed and satisfaction. Soon he would have three of the Infinity Stones at his disposal along with the Artifacts of Death. He will be that much closer to his objective. That much closer to his love and achieving the balance that she desires.

Harry jumped to the side as Thanos brushed pasted. Giant hand gently cupping the blue gem. He grunted a bit when he felt an intrusion in his mind. As if something else lurked there besides himself. Then he dropped it down into the designated fixture on the gauntlet. Energy washing outwards as it joined the other two.

“Well Harry, it would seem that you are a good luck charm. You have lead me to three of the Infinity Gems. Gems that have been hidden from me. Their power left to rot among the ignorant.” Harry's eye twitched secretly blaming his Potter luck for leading the Evil Villain like guy to powerful ancient artifacts.

From what he can tell the man has collected some form of **_accio_** like gem, a gem that lets him travel across the universe like Harry, and whatever this **_Imperio_** like gem did. While he didn't know what the other three where he was smart enough to not want them to fall into Thanos's hands. Slowly he made his way backwards to the door. From past experience he knew that he couldn't **_apparit_** away since it could just land them in another potential location of the gems. However he could always try to escape the old fashion way.

Honestly Harry really just wanted to find a way home. Not having to deal with evil maniacs trying to take over the world. Thinking quickly he cast a **_Bombarda_** at the tiled ground. An explosion of dust and tile fragments filled the air obscuring vision. Mission accomplished he made a brake for the door.

Just as he broke into a run he tripped over something on the floor and went down hard smacking his face in the process. With a groan he pushed up onto all fours slightly dizzy. Something black was laying in his way. However it was hard to make out past all the floating dust and his now cracked glasses lens.

Casting a silent **_Repairo_** on the lens he was finally able to see the object. It was the body of the governmental military man. Red and black patch depicting a skull with six tentacles. As if representing some form of eldritch monster.

Harry had forgotten all about them with the arrival of Thanos. Now that he thought of it, where were they. He was sure that they would have acted by this point.

Confused he got back to his feet. Positive that his face and knees were going to be bruised in a few hours. He looked around concerned now that he didn't know what was going on with the secret military police. However he couldn't see anyone. Which with the giant cloud of dust obscuring his ability to see far it was not a surprise.

However something felt off. An amused chuckle came from behind him as if reminding him of why he was escaping. Shaking off his concern he made a brake for the door again. Only to freeze as some purple shifty portal formed in front of him. “Now Harry, we have some where to be. Someone for you to meet formally.”

Harry wondered if a **_pretago_** would be able to act as a makeshift wall instead of a shield. It would be great if it could prevent himself from going through that thing. He could feel Thanos getting closer. It was worth a shot. Pulling a shield up he tried to expand it to cover the edges of the portal. Almost as if to trap it. Just as he was about to succeed a large heavy object slammed into him. Both him and the unknown projectile tumbled through the portal.

Harry's head slamming into the hard ground causing his vision to grey around the edges. The last thing he saw was a flash of long blond hair and concerned blue eyes as he sprawled out on the ground. Limbs tangled with the solid object. Then blissful nothingness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I finally finished this chapter. Not really sure why it took so long to write, but here you go.  
> Hope you enjoyed the disaster that is Harry's life.


	6. But it is a Raccoon?

The bliss known as unconsciousness did, unfortunately, not last long. In fact it was broken quite abruptly by a shrill scream. Harry swam into being to a whirl of colors and noise. It was... not the worst experience he has ever had, but why compare events. It really doesn't matter if it is not the worst thing you are experiencing when it is not good.

He tried to explain this once to Ron when he broke his wrist playing a muggle sport. No one is really sure how he managed to brake it in four places as there was nothing remotely dangerous about 'badminton'. However Harry stands by the fact that it has 'bad' in the name so he should have seen it coming. Then again he digresses.

Ron had jokingly said that at least this time there was no Lockheart to banish his bones so it could always be worse. As he was carted off to a muggle hospital having been unable to avoid the ambulance someone had called. Harry was less than amused and in pain so he proceeded to tell his ignorant friend about the wonders of situation comparison and how that only works afterwards NOT during. Hindsight is a wonderful useless skill that only enhances residual feelings. Ron was less then convinced.

However that only lasted until we got to the hospital and were told they were going to have to cut into my arm, and that they had this wonderful new experimental laser surgery that they would love him to agree to. They just had to stick him with a needle and inject something to put him under. However he would be fine in a couple of hours! To say the least Ron was horrified. Harry had just turned to him with a pointed look.

While this was not the most painful situation for him it was still pretty high up there on emotionally traumatizing. Especially to Ron when they said they filmed it for medical purposes and gave them a copy. All excited and wanting to share what they were doing while Harry was knocked out. Long story short it was useless to compare bad situations. Especially while enduring them.

Why this particular incident was on his mind was the wonderful swirling haze that claimed to be his vision. Disturbingly similar to the drug induced one he experienced after waking up from wrist surgery.

The piercing shriek did not last long, but it was extremely effective. Harry became aware of a large warm moving object pinning him down to a hard metal floor. Loud mumbling coming from above. Concerned blue eye's coming into focus as he shook his head. Shocked an undignified voice escaped him as magic blasted the offending person off his body.

Truly it was unless to compare situations. “I think I need an adult.” Harry muttered while getting to his feet.

A desperate voice filtered in past his panic. “You see! Everyone makes that noise when they are startled! It is not girly!” A man of average hight and shaggy brown hair tried justifying. Harry could only assume it was him that made that banshee like noise.

“I do not believe that everyone releases such a shrill voice when taken by surprise. Mine for one is very deep and intimidating.” A tall pinkish red tattooed balled man said. One eyebrow raised in judgement.

“I'll agree with the walkin' thesaurus on this one. You're girly, Quill.” Came a harsh laugh from what Harry believes is a heavily armed talking raccoon. Yeah, he was just going to let that one pass. Harry came from a magical world with dragons. Why can't a completely muggle animal without a hint of magic in its system talk. Selective denial was such a beautiful thing.

Harry was still trying to convince Hermione of its usefulness but his argument was just added to a long list of reasons why Harry needs to see a mind healer. Like that was ever going to happen. What would he even tell them. 'Hi my name is Harry and I have died. But not for long. I came back and now I am the master of death!' Yeah, not happening. Harry isn't even sure what all Hermione has on the list at this point. It seems like every time he opens his mouth she adds a new thing.

“Brother I see you are awake!” Boomed a voice over to the left. A large blond haired Asgardian pulling himself up from a circle of broken display cases. Glass shards falling to the ground in a glittery cascade. Not a scratch on him. Harry frowned in displeasure.

Why was it that he could end up covered in glass and instead of looking like a slow-mo model cut scene in a movie he actually looked like he fell through glass. With small yet painful cuts all over his body. Along with blood, dirt, and frayed clothes. It was completely unfair. Harry was going to hate this guy on principle.

“I am not your brother you talking mountain.” He muttered while taking in his surroundings. Broken glass was everywhere along with scorch marks. The metal floor and indent in the wall pretty much confirmed that Harry was back at this Collector guy's place.

In all honesty it looked to be in pretty rough shape. He was pretty sure that it would cost quite a bit of money to get everything back into running condition.

“We have wasted enough time. Let's sell the stone and go after my father.” A green woman in tight leather demanded. Snatching a glowing orb from Quill and walking further into the mess of a room.

“Wow, wait a minute. You can't just walk off with the orb like that.” Quill responded making a grab for the object. The two quickly broke into a flirty quarrel of the round object.

Harry watched on in slight disgust. “Are they always like this?” He asked the talking raccoon. It wasn't that harry hated couples... ok, maybe he did. But only because their flirting nature was sickening. As well as distracting from a goal. Case and point the two people now arguing over a ball completely ignoring the fact that two unknown people appeared out of a portal. A portal that was still open and now releasing the purple giant overlord. Honestly couples were a danger to ones judgement.

“Ah, I see you made it Harry. I was a bit concerned when Thor followed you through.” His voice slightly amused as his eyes fell on them.

“Wow, wow, wow! Back up. Your with this guy?” The raccoon asked disbelief coating his voice. Fur puffed out to make him look bigger. It reminded Harry of Crookshanks.

“I am not with this thief although I would be grateful for your help.” Thor said with a nod of his head to the raccoon.

“Father?” Gasped out the no longer quarreling green woman. A shout of rage echoed around the room drawing everyones attention the large pinkish red man.

“Thanos! I am Drax the Destroyer and today I shall end your life in the name of my wife, Ovette, and my daughter, Kamaria!” He declared launching himself forward at the giant. Harry watched on as the man, Drax, flew through the image of Thanos slamming into a already broken group of display cases.

“I shall help you with your revenge brother! Let us take down this thief together!” Thor's hammer sailing through the air only to go through a portal and ram into the back of Thor's head sending him to the ground. Harry looked at the two downed warriors and felt an intense need to facepalm. It was only through immense will power that he managed to reframe.

“I'm surrounded by idiots.” The raccoon grumbled. “Large brute strength idiots.” His paws swiftly building an object out of the scrap metal he was carrying.

Thanos ignored the two pulling themselves from the floor and made his way to quarreling couple. Eyes on the orb. “Gamora, my daughter. I am pleased that you found the orb.” The green woman tightened her hold on the object as she turned fully to face him. Her body managing to smoothly slide in front of Quill making him seem unimportant. Harry was slightly impressed by that move.

“Of course father.” She said her body relaxed. As Thanos finally made it in front of them. Quick as a snake her free hand lashed out before being grabbed by Thanos. Sharp knife gleaming in the dim light of the Collector's store. Seriously what is up with this man's daughters and knives!

A deep chuckle pulled its way out of the giant as he disarmed his daughter. “Ah, yes. How could I ever doubt your abilities daughter?” His other hand pulling the orb from her hand. Another roar came from behind Thanos as Drax ran at his unprotected back.

With a lift of his eyebrow two portals opened up. One under Thanos and another under Harry. With a yelp he fell through the hole. A sparking sputter from the Elder Wand had him dropping from high in the air. Cool wind rushing past his ears. “Why!”


	7. Soul Gem?

Harry was really getting tired of falling. This whole falling fiasco started with somersaulting through a nauseating void and just kept going. It really was getting old. He was beginning to wonder if this wasn’t on purpose. It would be just like the Artifacts of Death to do this as revenge. Especially the Death Stick.

The wand must still hold a grudge for that volcano incident. He was really sure that it would destroy it to. How was Harry supposed to know that it would be insulted when he tossed it into lava. Plus in his defense, Harry and Ron had just finished watching Lord of The Rings. It seemed like good advice. The evil horcrux ring from the movie was destroyed in one. Why couldn’t the most powerful wand be? In fact it should have been even easier to destroy as the wand is made of wood. A highly flammable substance.

In fact the wand had caught fire before it even hit the lava due to the intense heat. It just didn’t stay that way and instead retaliated by causing the volcano to erupt. It wasn’t the brightest moment in Harry’s past as he had to spend hours helping to evacuate people from the island. While his wand set about burning everything out of existence. Harry learned a lot about lava during this. However the most important thing he learned is that it does not destroy magical artifacts and movies lie.

After the evacuation and firefighting effort he was waylay-ed from going to bed by a very pissed off Hermione. Apparently she had just finished her Weasley clock based watch. Harry’s hand had been flashing between mortal parallel and something foolish this entire time and no one knew where he was. Which Harry takes offense to as he was never actually in mortal parallel.

As he drug his mind back to the present he realized the ground was a lot closer then before. Way closer than he was comfortable with. In a rush he cast a cushioning charm which may have been a bit over powered due to his panic. He smacked into the cushioned air and went flying off to the side like a demented trampoline. With a shout he rolled across the rocky ground.

Meanwhile three beings watched on in silence as the young man went sprawling across the barren wasteland. Dust following in his wake. Gamora winced as the impact sounds continued even though she couldn't see him anymore. With a grimace she rubbed her side remembering her own experience. She knew that he would definitely be feeling that tomorrow. If he lived that is.

Thanos however was vastly disappointed that this ridiculous and uncoordinated mortal was supposedly his loves master. The human couldn't even be trusted to come through a portal without causing a scene. How was that the Master of Death. With any luck the fall will have killed him. It would make getting the artifacts that much easier.

The last however, a man known as Drax the Destroyer, intergalactic criminal, seeker of revenge, and vastly under equipped to handle any social situation, was inspired! “Yes! That is a warrior!” He shouted overjoyed at the spectacle. “We shall avenge your death, brave one!” Gamora and Thanos both looked at Drax, as he continued his tirade, with slight trepidation.

With a sigh Thanos grabbed Gamora and headed after the fool mortal. He was in the same direction as the shrine anyways it was no great difficulty. Drax distracted as he was never noticed their departure.

~~~

The world was spinning for Harry and he wasn't sure if he was still rolling or he just hit is head too many times. Brown dirt clouded the air around him making it difficult to breath. He was sure that once the dust settles, and he could breath again, he would be pissed. Right now though all his focus was on making the world sit straight.

The Elder Wand was giving off an amused aura that just reinforced Harry's revenge theory. It was also a miracle that his glasses have survived everything so far. He was pretty sure that Luna had cast a stick charm on them when he wasn't looking. It would explain so much. Possible an impervious as well. She was giving Harry weird looks and giggling when he last saw her. Now that he thought of it didn't Harry see her not even an hour before he was summoned by Lucifer?

A giant purple hand burst through the cloud and grabbed onto the back of Harry's shirt. The shirt that he had already ripped once! Harry took a deep breath to inform the man just that only to inhale alien dirt. Sputtering and hacking he endured the indignity of being drug across the ground. His concern back on being able to breath.

It wasn't long after that he was dropped again. Gaining his barring Harry pushed up off the ground. The green woman giving him a slightly impress if not disturbed look. It was a look he was unfortunately familiar with and chose to ignore.

A man in a gray ratty cloak stood in front of black glass looking steps. _Obsidian_ whispered a voice that sounded suspiciously like Hermione. The cloak, while in tatters, was thick and barely moved in the wind. His face was shadowed making it impossible for Harry to see it. They stared at each other for a moment before the stranger seemed to dismiss Harry.

“Welcome Thanos to...”

“Hey did you just ignore me?” Harry asked over the man inordinately offended by this action. Usually he was all for being ignored but that was just rude. “I was just hauled across the ground like a sack of potatoes and your just going pretend it didn't happen?” The two stared at each other again. Harry's green eyes flashing in demand of answers.

“... the soul gem is just...”

“Yeah, no. Don't even think you can just evade answering. I really want to know what you thought just now.” Harry stepped out of the way as Thanos's hand swung out to snatch him. “You see that. Are you just going to ignore that too?”

The hooded figure just stood in silence his body language advertising just how uncomfortable he is with the situation. “Be quiet mortal. You are in the way.” Thanos growled out moving to shut Harry up. “I am only a two stones away from ultimate power.”

Harry scoffed and dodged again. “Ultimate power is overrated. Plus what are you going to achieve with it? Court Death? She seemed like a troll anyways. I mean look at what's happened!” With a snarl Thanos hurled a rock at Harry who yelped. “Fine, fine. I'll get you your blasted stone just stop throwing things at me. _Accio_ Soul Gem!”

“.. I don't think...” The hooded figure cut off again as a green pebble streaked across the sky landing lightly in Harry's outstretched hand. Stunned silence prevailed as they watched him inspect the rock. The pebble seemed to vibrate in happiness as he turned it. Green sparks shifting over its surface.

Suddenly another gem, this one dark and ominous, flashed into existence. Hovering next to Harry’s hand. With a frightened shiver the Soul Gem crumbled into dust. Its sparking green energy vanishing into the ether. The Resurrection Stone quickly took the gems place and hummed in satisfaction. Tendrils of magic curling possessively around his fingers like a cat winding through legs.

“Um, so I’m just going to go now.” He mumbled out soon followed by a crack as he vanished. The three people stood looking at where the wizard had just been. A shout calling in the distance about running away from retribution. However it was drowned out by an enraged roar. As fury unlike any seen before over took Thanos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. I kind of got overwhelmed in September as one of my co-workers said "Let's open the gates of hell and spread chaos and destruction across the office! Bwahahahaha!" 
> 
> Ok so maybe they didn't say it like that, but it sure felt like it. It was the end result as well.
> 
> Anyways I plan on finishing up this story before Halloween. Cheers to ambition!


	8. You Too?

Harry breathed a sigh of relief as he appeared in a dingy book filled room. He was pretty sure he only got away due to how stunned everyone was. If he wasn't so distressed by this whole situation he would have found their faces hilarious. As it is he glared down at the possessive little rock.

He had no idea how the stone _disintegrated_ the gem. A gem that had a whole lot of power and conscious will from what he was able to feel before its demise. Its power was so strong that a normal human would have died upon contact. However Harry was used to defying any form of 'should haves'.

Clicking his tongue he shoved the stone into his jeans pocket ignoring the soundless whine he could feel from it. He could deal with it later. It wasn't like he would loose it, unfortunately.

The room he appeared in seemed to be a library. Books lined the walls stretching from the ceiling to floor. A large window looking out into a snowy mountain range dominated one side of the room. Harry frowned as he examined the shelves. The books seemed to be about magic. Well a form of magic anyways. He had never heard of the “ _Mystic_ _Arts_ ” before. Curiously he plucked the book off the shelf.

It sounded like fiction. Well a wizard's version of fiction. Which Harry has found he enjoys quite a bit. Take a culture that is so steeped in magic and fantasy creatures. Then have them write what they think is fantasy. Well let's just say that he has learned some really interesting things. It is also funny that a lot of things that they write as fiction are actually true in the muggle world.

Harry has considered writing his own books. Something along the lines of ' _Logic for the Logically Impaired_ '. He was so excited about the idea he ended up explaining it to Hermione. That is when she decided to burst his bubble by pointing out that Harry was not the most logical person out there to begin with. That in fact Harry himself defies all logical reason. She then proceeded to pull out a _**physical**_ list of things he has done.

When he asked why she even has this list, because that is a weird thing to carry around, she grabbed her hair in frustration. Going on to explain that she wanted to workout some of the magical mysteries that happen around him. However there was nothing in the books she could find to help her. She had even gone as far as to exploring ancient burial tombs and - ~~break into~~ \- restricted libraries.

That there was in fact an entire group of Unspeakables she sends these problems too. Unspeakables that were now afraid to take any assignments she gives them after Dan got trapped in a trance like time loop. They still don't know how to fix it and have just marked off sections that he walks through and have a time table set up after he almost took blew up a room. Apparently he can't see anything that is not exactly the same as the day he got stuck in.

By this point Hermione was staring off into space muttering about a betting roster and horrible magical accidents. Harry took this as his queue to back away slowly and not draw a distressed Hermione's attention. He also decided that a book may be a bad idea. If for no other reason then Hermione might murder him. He did not survive through a megalomaniac only to be offed by an extremely stressed friend that decided getting rid of her problems would be so much easier.

This book seemed to be more of a grimoire though then a fantastic example of wizardry fiction. Harry flipped it over examining the fine leather work. It looked to be some form of seal or ward. Harry was just about to poke it a bit with his magic when a voice interrupted. “Who are you and how did you get in?” Harry spun, book falling to the ground, and Elder Wand in hand.

The man dressed in a blue robe, red cloak, and a glowing green neckless. All in all it was pretty normal compared to some of the clothing choices he had seen. His perfectly styled hair and posture gave off a serious Malfoy zibe though. He was probably rich. Not that Harry could judge as he inherited a lot of money and was now considerable rich. However there was rich and then there was I get whatever I want while you plebeians scramble to appease me rich.

Brown haired Malfoy raised a brow at Harry's lack of response. With a frown he spread his hands causing a fiery orange ritual circle to appear. “How did you do that? Do you know how hard it is to draw one of those?!”” Harry asked in jealously. It took hours to make ritual circles! The rune placement had to be perfect. A single miss drawn line could blow up the room or worse open a nether portal. Then there was this man who could just have them appear out of thin air as if it was nothing!

The man frowned glancing at his hand before flicking the mysterious runic based power at Him. With a yelp Harry jumped out of the way. “Look there is no need for that. We seem to have gotten off on the wrong foot.” He stumbled out dodging another whip of power.

“You broke into my house,” The man blandly stated while casually lashing out again while waving his hand at the book. “and are rummaging through my books.” Another circle appearing in his other hand.

The world tilted in a horrible rendition of floo travel. Only instead of stepping into green flames the world rearrange itself around you without ever changing positions. Which was untrue for Harry as he promptly ended up sprawled across the ground barrel rolling out of the way of yet another mysterious spell.

“Look, I'm sorry I broke into your house. I didn't know where this place is!” Harry cried out while dodging spells as best he could from the prone position. He was starting to feel a bit like a worm as this point. “Are we on Earth?” He asked a bit desperate to at least know the planet he was on.

The man clicked his tongue before a larger circle appeared around both hands. Harry's eyes grew wide at the intricacy displayed before him. He hastily threw a shield up understanding that there was no way to dodge this one. Just as the volatile man threw the spell Harry thought of the books. Not the fact that hundreds of books making up the room filled with unknown knowledge were going to be destroyed. No he thought of the fact that Hermione, lover of all forms of literature except divination, was somehow going to find out that he 'let' books be destroyed in his presents.

With growing horror of what would await him if he didn't do something he watched the spell fly at his shield. With a flash of green it was as if the world had slowed down giving him just enough time throw up more shield in front of the valuable shelves. Just as he finished the world speed back up to normal and slammed into his barrier.

The man and Harry stared at each other in silence as the ground broke apart between them show casing just how powerful the spell was. “You know I really do find it unfair that you can cast ritual magic without having to draw the runic circles.” Harry blurted out making the man lift an eye brow in judgement.

Out of nowhere something soft and red grabbed Harry tangling up around his limbs keeping him on the ground. Only know with no hope of dodging. “Good job cloak.” The man praised. The 'cloak' purred and shifted slightly around him.

“You too?” Harry asked not bothering to struggle against the magically sentient cloak.


	9. Beware the sleeping Dragon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Infinity Stone Index
> 
> Space - Purple  
> Mind - Blue  
> Soul - Green [ Destroyed by Resurrection Stone]  
> Reality - Yellow  
> Time - Orange  
> Power - Red

Harry wasn't sure what was happening anymore. Not long after he was 'captured', by yet another sentient magical item, the giant purple grape showed up with an entire entourage. The black haired wizard immediately engaged, in what Harry can only call, shit talking. 

A quick back and forth between them lead to Harry assuming that the green light was the 'Time Gem'. Whatever that is. There was some arguing, name calling, and one memorable note of how pompously you are able to insult someone by implying they have a small dick. Obviously Harry was paraphrasing. However that is essentially what was said. 

The wizard then opened up a shiny round portal, that sparked for some reason, leading to the top of blasted snowy mountain. Harry was not amused. He was pretty sure that if he didn't do something soon about the cold he was going to get frostbite. He already had to experience regrowing bones there was no way he would force himself to participate in whatever hellish concoction was used to cure hypothermia. 

Wiggling around in the cloak he cast a wandless heating charm. Ignoring the full scale battle happening right in front of him. Honestly he was pretty done with this whole experience. No matter what he said people still attacked him. Adhering to the shoot first ask questions later theory like it was a religion. Moody would be proud. 

He had tried talking it out. Only to be basically played by this universe's Death in some weird all knowing entity tantrum. Pitting the large man against Harry. So he ran. It was logical. At least it felt like it. He had been fighting all his life. Why should he have to now?

Only he ended up being stalked across the universe. One giant grape man seemingly torn between killing him and using him. It was utterly ridiculous. It was as if no matter what Harry did he would always have to fight.

He was not a toy. He was not meant to be tossed around and used. Forced into impossible situations with there only being violence as the answer. He was the Master of Death for Merlin’s sake. Granted it wasn’t a title he was willing to use most of the time. However this entire situation was getting on his nerves! 

With cold eyes he watched as one of the strangers from the group bulleted past him. His hair ruffling from the force of the body cutting through the air. The cloak shifted uneasily around him seeming to sense the shift in Harry's attitude. 

He was done. So very done. Talking didn't work. Running made it worse. Then there was only one answer.

His magic rolled restlessly just under his skin. Feeding off his growing anger. Wanting to lash out at the idiots that were blissfully unaware of the impending disaster. So focused on fighting over a small glowing stone that at best was some form of time turner.

Harry had learned early in his life to keep his emotions in check. As his magic was very eager to do anything he asked. Even if it was unconsciously. Wand or no wand. Sure a wand made it easier and helped to direct the magic, but it wasn't really necessary for Harry. However he was done. Screw keeping in check. Hermione and her 'anger management' books could go shove it. 

Shouts of pain and anger filled the air. Snow flying as people were flung through it or kicked it up as they fought. Harry slowly stood the red cape tightening in warning. “I suggest you go back to your master.” He said softly causing it to shiver. Harry's magic saturating the air and the cape quickly released him flying to the dark haired wizard. 

Harry stretched his arms into the air trying to loosen his muscles. His dirty torn clothes fluttering in the mountain breeze. Water slowly dripped as the snow melted under the effect of the warming charm. Elder wand buzzing in anticipation. 

He stepped forward snow clearing from his path as his magic pushed outwards. The air felt almost static as he moved. Still he went unnoticed. Everyone too busy fighting each other. Harry scoffed at their lack of observation abilities.

The magical cloak latched onto the Mystic Arts Wizard causing him to glance over at Harry in confusion. What he saw made his eyes go wide. The air looked distorted with the amount of power radiating from the short man. Fear dancing just below the surface as the wizard watched him advance. 

Thanos paused as well to look over at the mortal boy that had destroyed HIS stone. The stone that was needed to finally accomplish his greatest wish. This was not what he expected. 

Magic swirled out and latched on to the nearest body sending them backwards. Sparky shiny ringed portals opened up around them as more people joined the brawl. This world's form of wizard. Harry ignored them all. It was not his problem. No his problem lay with the large purple grape that chased him all around the universe. Refusing to let him go.

Trying to use him. Trying to steal what was his. Well it wasn't going to happen. His magic whipped out and lashed at the giant with a vengeance. Several cuts appearing as Harry's magic withered angrily around the man. Thanos dropped to his knees in agony. 

It was as if the world froze around them as Harry slowly made his way to the downed overlord. Hands casually placed in the surpassingly intact pockets. The crunch of his steps echoing. “I hope you're happy.” He growled out eyes flashing to a luminous green. “Your rainbow rocks all gathered for you to use. Why don't you summon Death? I'm sure she would just love to see this. A scuffle on the peak of mountain.”

Thanos grunted as ropes snaked their way around him. Forming from the very ground he stood on. They refused to give even though he was boosted by the Power Gem. Thanos struggled against the binds only for them to tighten. Restricting him to the point of pain. 

“No?” Harry asked the silent giant unamused. “Well if you will not summon her I will. It is after all her game. She should see the end first hand.” Harry raised his hand magic gathering around his fingers. With a sharp snap the power condensed to a pinpoint before exploding out. 

The figure of Death appearing out of thin air as if she was forcibly apparated. She stumbled slightly at the sudden change. Her black cloak hiding her from prying eyes. Brittle bone hands slowly morphed to delicate pale skin. “Oh my.” Death spouted lightly. As if she had just caught her child with the cookie jar. “That was rather rude Master.” 

Harry scoffed as soft wavy black hair escaped as she pulled back her hood. Death's pale pupilless eyes shifted across the battle field before landing on her champion. “I had such high hopes for you.” She hummed in disappointment. Thanos flinched before bowing his head in subservience to the goddess. “Although you have been so fun to watch. Bringing balance to all those worlds.” 

“I'm sure it was delightful entertainment.” Harry cut in bored. “However I would just love to make my way home now. Your game is over. The Grape has gathered your shiny rocks-” A high pitched laugh cut him off. 

“Oh, you miss understand Master.” She hissed like a snake. Harry was kind of disturbed about how many people actually did that. Especially when they didn't even have the excuse of speaking parseltongue. “The rocks, as you so elegantly put it, are nothing. Mere trinkets. No, my champaign has failed. He failed as soon as you escaped.” 

Shadows gathered in the bright snowy landscape. Pooling thickly at Death's feet. “He failed when you flounced across the universe in a mockery of my powers. He failed when you refused to even engage him in combat. Like he was so far beneath you. When really you are just some lucky mortal who gathered artifacts one of my brothers was stupid enough to create in a bout of boredom.”

Faint shuffling could be heard has people slowly and quietly tried to back away from the immortal being. “Its not like I wanted them.” Harry all but growled out. “I did not want to be the 'Master of Death'. Its not like a woke up one day and went 'Oh, hey you know what why don't I go put my life in danger some fairy tale.'!” The Resurrection Stone buzzed slightly as if whining while the wand stayed smugly silent. 

“'Here Harry, this cloak belonged to your father. Marry Christmas.' 'Oh, Harry here is this random snitch. It will open up in your time of need.' 'Oh, Harry go take the wand from Draco. He was the last one to fight for it...'” Harry trailed off slightly everyone watching cautiously. “I guess they were easy to gather.” He mused. “They were kind of just given to me. How has no one else ended up as the Master of Death?” 

Death screamed and launched herself at Harry. Blackened nails aimed at his face like claws. There was a startled shout distantly in the back as Harry dodged out of the way reflexively. He was pretty sure he heard someone call out to finish the circle, but he was more concerned with the immortal trying to rip him to pieces. Thanos all but forgotten. 

Harry flicked his wand causing spears of ice to go flying at the threat. Only to have them vanish in a flash of yellow. Death smirked. “I may not be able to use my powers against you. However the same can not be said of the gems!” Her fist slammed down into the stone cracking it as Harry danced out of the way. 

Clicking his tongue he transfigured the broken shards into beasts. Trying to keep the woman back from close combat. A purple light was all the warning he had as one of his beasts smashed into his shield. Where Death had managed to send it through a portal. Space distorting at her will. 

Harry formed more beasts of stone as a distraction hoping to create an opening. One of his creations glowed blue before turning on the others. Death liberally using the power and space gem. Harry dodged more shards of rock as he cast. 

Spotting an opening summoned the orange gem causing it to fly into his free hand. Harry had no idea how to destroy the powerful item and had no time to pause and think about it as a turned beast tried to take his leg. Frustrated he shoved the gem into his pocket hoping it would stay there as he cast a blasting spell at the misguided golem. 

The world seemed to fracture and tilt in a haze of yellow as he cast a modified sticking charm. Allowing him to now run on the slanted terrain. He shot a spell at Deaths feet making the ground slick and hard to stand on. With a huff she glided across the ice un hampered by the change. 

Another beast jumped at him as he summoned another shield. Grumbling he animated the snow causing it to slosh and try and burry Death. She flickered in and out of view as she jumped across space vindictive ice particles chasing in her wake. 

Blasting another rock golem he missed the wave of snow that crashed into him. With a shout he hit the ground snow hissing around him due to the over powered heating charm. Harry felt a shift in the snow where something stepped. Angrily his hand shot out of the drift and grabbed the appendage pulling the woman to the ground. Death shouted as she went down in a cloud of white snow. 

Harry took his chance and summon blue gem. Its power skimming across his mind before he shoved it into his pocket with the other one. The snow melted around him turning into a pool of water strangely clinging around him. He tried to swim out of it only to be followed. His lungs burning for air as he tried to escape. 

Death laughed from her spot on dry land. Harry quickly cast a bubble head charm and sent a blast of magic at her. If he could not get out than he will just evaporate it. He summoned fire. Fiendfire jumping all too easily to his command. The fire lashed out as if hunting the particles of water like prey. 

Reality shifted again as all the lights went out. The only light coming from the malicious fire. A strange flash of red warned him to jump out of the way as a spray of stone shards cut into his arms. Death lunged forward again dodging around the hunting fire. Startled he summoned a wall of ice to block her way.

Death smashed it like glass giving chase. This time Harry transfigured the broken ice. The creatures immediately coming to his aid causing the woman to back off again. He cast a summoning charm as soon as she had to switch opponents. A purple gem quickly joining the others. 

He had just enough time to jump out of the way as an icy chimera slid past him. He directed the fire to eat the darkness before focusing back on the enraged woman. Blocking a blow with a shield around his arm cast another blasting charm at her. Slivers of light now cutting through the dark. Causing a weird strobe light effect any time one of them went from the dark to light areas.

Harry cast a water charm immediately followed by a freezing one. hoping to encase her in ice. Reality bent however and vanished the magic off into the void around them. 

“Found you!” Came a shout making the two pause. A shadowy figure seemed to bleed out of the remaining darkness panting. “I finally found you.” It sounded close to tears. The black robes appeared to be smoking with tears scattered randomly along the cloth. 

The two slowly stood up straight and faced the stranger. “After all this time and effort.” A skeletal hand latched onto Harry's wriest before he could react. “How did you even end up here?” It asked as a scythe materialized. “Wait no, we know how. Let's - let's just go home. There is no telling what those monsters have been up to while we have been gone.” 

The scythe slashed the air making it split open with disturbing ease. With a tug Harry vanished into the either with the cloaked figure. The rip stitching itself up like it never was. 

Death stood silently looking confusedly at the empty air. Fire vanishing along with all other traces of magic cast by her Master. “Um...” She glanced around the broken reality that was their battle field a bit lost. Black blood dripped down her arm where she had been able to defend against his attacks. Her flowing purple dress all but shredded from his summoned beasts. 

With a step forward reality fractured and returned to the snowy mountain. The signs of destruction still clearly visible. With another step she disappeared. Returning to her home away from the mortals. 

Thanos stood still amidst the rubble somehow unaffected by the unimaginable battle that had occurred. A glowing orangey red sparking around the area where the wizards, or as they are more commonly known sorcerers held a temporal shield. Their magic immensely strained from the effort to contain the fight. Only managing due to the lack of regard the two beings had held towards them. 

With a shuddered breath Thanos sat down on the ground. Hands shaking at what he had witnessed. He knew he was caught. There was no escaping without any of the Gems. However at this point he wasn't even sure he wanted to escape. The fact that the 'mortal' had just chosen to escape instead of fight back can only be counted as luck on his part. There was also no way his Mistress would come for him. Especially not with how he failed her. How she believed him able to win against THAT was... flattering. If she believed he would win that is. 

Disbelieving laughter escaped him startling the observers. His daughter would be disappointed in him. Thanos thought as he gazed at the sunny blue sky. So at odds with what had just occurred.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I live! Also sorry about the VERY late update and finally to the story. For some reason the last chapter just fought with me. The uncooperative creative juices. 
> 
> Anyways hope you enjoyed the end of Botched.

**Author's Note:**

> Hoped you enjoyed!
> 
> Comments are loved and suggestions taken into account. ~


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